#5 1981. I was 3 years old and my older brother was 7 years old at the time. My mom had bought Weight Watchers ice cream sandwiches for my older brother at the time. Well at the time, I was sneaking in the refrigerator all hours of the night eating about a couple of Weight Watchers ice cream sandwiches. Two of my other older brothers that were there, my mom would accuse them of eating up our brother's ice cream sandwiches. My mom didn't believe them when my older brothers told her that they didn't eat his ice cream sandwiches. So one night at 3 AM in the morning my mom heard paper rattling and went into the living room and spotted me opening up the ice cream sandwich and eating it.
My mom said to me, "Paul why are you eating up your brother's ice cream sandwiches?"
I boldly said, "Because it's good and I like it." I was only 3 years old at the time and I still remember that like it happened yesterday.
#4 1998. My 5th oldest brother and his girlfriend at the time sent for me and my mom to come to Orlando, FL to stay with them. My brother had took us out somewhere in Orlando (I believe it might have been a Flea Market in Orlando). My brother was joking around with our mom saying to her, "Ma, what are you, a size 2?" My mom said, "No boy!" My mom always told everyone that my 5th oldest brother is the one that gave her the most trouble and she calls him son #5. My mom had seven of us all boys and she always says that she has to number us. My brother responded, "Ma, all you eat is fruit, vegetables, and drink water. People will ask you one day, Ms. Grady what would you say was the reason for your longevity? Ma, you at 103 is gonna say "it was that purified water." My 5th oldest brother had me and my mom laughing because it was so funny.
#3 1996. My mom has a friend who lived in Brooklyn, NY. Now she lives in the Bronx. She lived in Hartford, CT for many years. She always used to take the train from NY to CT. My mom's friend was telling me the time her daughter told her son to slam his Grandma. My mom's friend is about 5' 8" and my mom’s friend's grandson is about 6' 3" Listening to his mom, my mom's friend grandson slammed his grandma. My mom's friend used to lift a lot of heavy stuff on her job so her grandson really wasn't thinking about that when he slammed his grandma. My mom's friend told me that she must have slammed her grandson like 10 times. This wasn't the funny part. The funny part was when my mom's friend told me that she said to her grandson, "You're getting heavy and pretty soon I won't be able to do this anymore." I thought that was so funny.
#2 1994. Conversation in the classroom and on the basketball courts. It all started when we were in Reading class. I'm only using first names.
Ramon: Yo, Anthony (16 years old 6' 2") got in a fight at the mall.
Jonathan: Yo, I beat up Anthony in Sunday school when we were in Kindergarten and I beat him up in 6th grade. I don't like that kid.
Us: Who did he fight?
Ramon: A white boy (13 years old 5' 4")
Us: Who won?
Ramon: …It was a tie.
Us: Okay.
Now we were on the basketball courts at Bloomfield high school and we are all just shooting around. It must have been like 8 or 10 of us talking. Jonathan thought it would be cool if he instigated something.
Jonathan: Yo, Shelton do you think you can beat Anthony in ball?
Shelton: Yep!
Anthony: Okay yo.
Jonathan: Hey Shelton do you think you can beat Anthony in fights?
Shelton: Of Course. You think I'm going to say uh… yeah, shoot!
Jonathan: LOL!
Anthony: We don't want to get on how Alex beat you up now!
Us: (Sucks teeth) That's old news!
Shelton: We don't want to get on how a little white boy beat you up at the mall... AND IN FRONT OF GIRLS'. (Shelton punches his hand to demonstrate how bad Anthony was beaten up) Yo, why are you here? Don't show your face around school and for real yo you should get off the basketball courts!
Us: LOL!
Me: I heard from Ramon that it was a tie.
Jonathan: Yeah, I heard from Ramon that it was a tie.
Shelton: No it was not a tie Anthony got his butt whupped!
Jonathan: So Shelton, white boy handled his business?
Shelton: Yo, white boy handled his business. Anthony can’t see white boy. He told Anthony several times to shut up and stop talking junk and Anthony was sleeping on white boy. In fact, everyone on the basketball courts can beat up Anthony. (Shelton call a few of us out) Jonathan you can beat up Anthony he can't fight... Paul you can beat up Anthony he can't fight... Wiley you can beat up Anthony he can't fight... I'm telling y'all Anthony don't have hands he can't fight! (Shelton demonstrated how Anthony getting beaten up like he did how Anthony embarrassed himself and his friends at the mall)
Me: I heard that Anthony was getting his hits. Anthony you were getting your hits right?
Shelton: No Paul!
Me: Anthony did you get at least a hit?
Anthony: Yo, I got my butt whupped!
Me: Shelton (I was prepared to hear some gossip) what happened?
Shelton: Paul this is what happened. Anthony started it & white boy finished it! (Slang terminology for Anthony was running his mouth and white boy shut his mouth)
Some of the funniest things that happen sometimes is conversations we have on the basketball courts or at school.
#1 1983: My 2nd oldest brother met a girl when he was selling magazines in Detroit, MI back in 1975. They were 16 years old at the time. My 2nd oldest brother and the girl who would eventually be his wife hit it off when they met. She sent my 2nd oldest brother a picture of her. My 2nd oldest brother was going to Greater Hartford Community College before it became Capital Community College and my 2nd oldest brother met a woman in Hartford back in 1978 (while my 2ndoldest brother and my 3rd oldest brother were both in Jobs Corps). My 2nd oldest brother and the woman were going out for a while (a year) and they got them a place together in Downtown Hartford back in 1979 (where my 2nd oldest brother, his girlfriend, and my 3rd oldest brother were living in at the time). Well, the woman was not the marrying type and my 2nd oldest brother could sense that when he brought her by my mom's house in 1980 (on Mother's Day) and my mom knew in her heart that this woman wasn't right for my 2nd oldest brother but didn't want to say anything (A mother's instinct). So my 2nd oldest brother was talking to the woman he met in Detroit in 1975 on the phone, and my 2nd oldest brother moved to Detroit in 1981(where he was staying with her and her parents while working at Tony March Buick and attending the University of Michigan); my 2nd oldest brother's fiancée's father bought them a house in 1982 and my 2nd oldest brother married his fiancée in 1983. This comes the funny part, probably one of the funniest I'm not your baby daddy story that you would ever hear. My 2nd oldest brother's ex-girlfriend had a son who was 2, my 2nd oldest brother brought his wife to her house in Hartford. My 2nd oldest brother had a son that was a year old with his wife and they were expecting another baby boy that same year in 1983. My 2nd oldest brother's ex-girlfriend told my mom what happened. My 2nd oldest brother's wife was cooking up all of the food in my 2nd oldest brother ex-girlfriend's kitchen.
My 2nd oldest brother said to his ex-girlfriend (referring to his wife), "This my woman. I like my woman yellow. See that yellow and she cook real good too. You see how she cook for everyone in here. She even cook for you too (referring to his ex-girlfriend)."
My 2nd oldest brother saw his ex-girlfriend's son and said to his ex-girlfriend, "This is a pretty Puerto Rican baby but he is not my kid." So my 2nd oldest brother picked up the baby, held the baby, and my 2nd oldest brother was playing with the baby. My 2nd oldest brother then was talking to the baby in Spanish because my 2nd oldest brother could speak fluent Spanish. The baby was laughing at every word that my 2nd oldest brother was saying to him.
My 2nd oldest brother said to his ex-girlfriend, "There you go. Look at the boy, now the boy is laughing, can't you see he is not my kid? The boy is laughing because he understands every word that I said."
Some stuff will make you laugh to where you will never stop laughing. Every time I think about what my mom said that my 2nd oldest brother's ex-girlfriend said to my mom what my 2nd oldest brother said to his ex-girlfriend, I always laugh. My mom told my 2nd oldest brother's ex-girlfriend when she asked my mom did my 2nd oldest brother ever tell her this. My mom said, "No and he would never tell me that."
Those are my top 5 funny experiences in my family and not in my family.
via GIPHY
(In Memory of the late Terrance Devoice Anderson 8/28/1959-9/10/1987)
My 2nd oldest brother the late Terrance Devoice Anderson (August 28, 1959- September 10, 1987) Hartford, CT/Detroit, MI. My brother will always be remembered as a comedian, a salesman, who had the gift of gab, a journeyman, who traveled to 42 states including also going out of the country and is survived by his beautiful wife Betty (Toni) Frierson Anderson, his 3 children the late Tarik E. Carey (February 3, 1981- September 30, 2010), Terrance Q. Anderson, and the late Kenneth Eugene Anderson (May 2, 1983- November 7, 2010). My brother is a constant reminder of live life to the fullest and because of that my brother will always be remembered for what he has done.
Terrance & Betty (Toni) Anderson
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